What am I leaving, when I’m done here?

Finally met up with Ms Ho, my all-time favourite tuition teacher, after more than half a year. Time really flew past so fast. Just 8 months ago, I was still having 4-hour GP tuitions; boosting my vocabulary, analytical and essay-writing skills. There’s just so many things to love about this lady.

She has made me a more perceptive person, since I was being tutored at the age of 15. She’s an awesome teacher, mother and a friend. Every time I talk to her, be it having inputs during lessons, or just personal talk, our conversations end with me feeling great.

She has taught me countless amount of life lessons and wise words, that I will never forget.

“It’s nice to be great but it’s always good to be nice.”

“Anger is one letter short of danger.”

Witty, and so true.

She has been an amazing pillar of strength, leaning shoulder and listening ear.

I have always been telling myself things would turn out fine since the start of J1. I told myself, as long as I worked harder, I would be able to achieve decent results. So I just kept brainwashing myself with the concept that I’m from Dunman High, so things wouldn’t be that bad right?

Apparently, deep down, I knew things were really that bad.

I still remember how just a month before A levels, I had a private one-on-one session with her. She started asking about my studies, and I just could not contain the pressure that was contained within me anymore. I started sobbing uncontrollably. It suddenly hit me as clear as daylight that things were not going to be fine at the end of the day. All I really wanted, was just to pass, and get over and done with; this damned examination. When you can literally see (Yes, my coursework – A huge mural; 2m x 4.5m approx) how you’re on the brink of failing, you don’t see why you should keep deceiving yourself and think that it will all turn out well.

I knew my coursework (And SOVA) was shitty. I knew my Econs was hopeless, considering I was a straight-U student.

I was crazy; crazy to have thought that I would come out fine at the end of the gruelling 2-year journey.

But anyway, Ms Ho’s words just took the insanity out of me. I was thankful for her constant encouragement, and sweet little text the day before GP paper.

Hugging her today was just, great. I’ve never actually felt this close to an adult, the age of my parents before.

I’ve always thought to myself that, if I were to become a parent one day, I would definitely want to be like her. I must learn how to be patient, be in full control of my temperament and be close to my kids.

I want them to treat me like a friend. When some guy breaks my daughter’s heart, I want her to be able to confide in me. When my son has a crush on a girl, I want to tell him to pluck up the courage to chase her. Y’know??

Then again, I really doubt I have the patience with kids…

There are people whom you will be so thankful for, to have them in your lives. Ms Ho is definitely one of them for me. She has made a remarkable change in my life.

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