Seize the day.

My first University semester has finally come to an end (Well, just one more day…) It kind of feels so surreal, finally having a school holiday whereby you need not do revision or rush out assignments at the very last week. It was one hell of a hectic semester; juggling 5 modules, was simply crazy, considering that I’m not a very disciplined person, who would do her work and revision consistently.. Before you know it, a test slaps you even the face and you have to prepare it in the shortest amount of time possible. As if that wasn’t enough, the crazy amount of projects that we were tasked for each module… Grah. I’m starting to dislike group work and presentations.

I used to be pretty comfortable with presentations.. Wasn’t really the kind who would ramble off my script.. Maybe my memory has been declining, I don’t know. I’m getting really bad at remembering my points, I end up referring so much to my script. Maybe it’s the lack of time to prepare and know my stuff well. After doing so many group projects, I’m also starting to detest it. I’m fine with short mini ones that last for 2/3 days. Not those that would extend for weeks and the whole ‘diffusion of responsibility’ is just kind of out of hand. It’s like, I can put in so much for one project and then for the subsequent projects, I feel so burnout that I want to slack off so badly.

I really wanted to semester to kick off well, to be sort of an energy booster for the rest of my first year, but it seems like after 14 weeks, I’m completely exhausted. I’m starting to worry about the other semesters which would be long and I would only have 2 weeks of break. I would keep my fingers crossed and hope that I don’t lose my sanity by the end of first year.

Everyone’s so competitive so I guess in a sense, I would have to push myself equally hard as well to ensure that I’m good enough, and don’t stray too far off. And it’s so funny, how since Secondary 1, I’m never the kind of person who would study, at all. I wouldn’t read my literature textbooks, I wouldn’t do my homework. I would read online summaries, copy my friends’ work, sleep for most lessons, if not space out. And then now, I’m actually doing more studying, not sure if the effort is the same as I put in for JC (Which wasn’t really much, but I started to attempt assignments, tutorials and practise essays). Maybe it’s the way we’re being tested, maybe because it’s MCQs, so I slack off a little at times.

I got to do better than this, got to stop dozing off in class. Sometimes I’m a little torn, maybe I should find out more ways on how to stay awake in class, other than drinking coffee.

I can do this \m/

P.S. I managed to find the ‘centre justified’ button a while ago. OCDOCDOCDOCD.

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